it is only after awhile that you learn
the subtle difference
between holding a hand
and chaining a soul

and you learn that love doesn’t mean possession
and company doesn’t mean security.

And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts
and presents aren’t promises

and you begin to accept your defeats
with your head up
and your eyes ahead
with the grace of an adult
not the grief of a child.

and you learn to build your roads today
because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans
and futures have ways of falling down
in mid-flight.

after awhile you learn that even sunshine burns
if you get too much
so you plant your own garden
and decorate your own soul
instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.

and you learn that you really can endure
that you really are strong
and you really do have worth…

…and you learn, you learn what it means to unconditionally love another person
because you have first learned what it means to love yourself…

- veronica a. shoffstall